is not me. Filling the silence with senseless chatter, that is me. Despite the husband sending signals of replying in 'hmms' and less than audible 'hmms' and not looking up from his Mac book, I will still continue to tell him about what the maid told me about someone in the building that day.
A voice in the head tells me to shut up. I mean, really, what interest will it hold for him. But, I continue. Not to fill the void. We are quite comfortable with each other and savour these patches of quiet, especially delicious after kids and pets vying for attention.
Sadly, I talk incessantly to shut the train of thoughts in my head. Thoughts telling me to finish the hateful chores, thoughts screaming at me not to put off that phone call, thoughts telling me to accept that today I'll have to cook and clean, so I might as well get up from the stupor and get some food on the table.
Sometimes, these thoughts tell me to be disciplined and be done with the tasks so as to better enjoy the cup of tea. But, I suffer from a severe case of eating-the-icing-before-the-cake syndrome. And, it only gets worse if you don't have a boss to meet deadline for or someone to whom you are answerable.
*five minutes after*
... and, i ran out of rant.
tea with myself is distressing